Sunday, July 6, 2008

Trials, Tribulations, and Triumphs

I've decided to add a word to a phrase that's been around for as long as I can remember, so I'm sure it was around way before that. The phrase is 'trials and tribulations,' and the word I've added to it is 'triumphs.' When I think about the many trials and/or tribulations that I've experienced, there has always been triumphs along with them...or just prior to...or even after. Now, that's something to be excited about because if you noticed I did say "the many trials and/or tribulations that I've experienced," so that tells you I have experienced many triumphs also, and then again what about all the triumphs that come without the trials and tribulations. So, what does that say? It says that I have experienced more triumphs than trials and tribulations. WOW, PRAISE GOD!

I can't help but wonder if that's so for everyone. I'm sure some will say definitely not, but I also have to wonder it that's true...or is it that they just don't notice the triumphs? There are times that I don't. When I look back to all the times I prayed not to be going through a specific trial, I can now see that if I wasn't there, then I wouldn't be here 'where I am now.' Those are the prayers I'm glad now that weren't answered. Somehow we seem to make situations to be all about us, and we want them to work out a certain way for us. When they don't, I can see how it's a good thing they weren't because it isn't only about us. So then I guess those prayers actually were answered, just not the way I wanted or expected, instead it was just that someone else knew what was best for me. So why don't we trust Him enough? I say enough because we say we do, then realize that we didn't when we should have. Sound confusing??? Well in a way it is, and in a way it's very simple.

We already know the end of the story, so what's our problem? My guess? We are our problem. And so, we continue to learn and grow and try our very best to make life about living for and with others instead of just ourselves.

Some trials and tribulations I am experiencing right now are actually about one very small person, my eleven year old son, and also the lives of my three older grown sons. I am learning how to be a single mom. After twenty-five years of learning what a marriage is supposed to be, I'm now learning how to be divorced...that's me, always learning something new. Where's the triumph in that you might ask. It's that I've learned to lean on my most trusted Father, the Lord, and seek His advice in everything I do, when I remember to. When I don't remember to, that's when the triumph is in not getting what I want.

This may sound pretty impressive to some, but there is something I'm ashamed of...that most times even while basking in the triumphs, it's still difficult for me to be thankful for the trials and tribulations. What a selfish breed we are, us humans.

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