Self-Help

With all the self-help books out there, I've never seen one for self-help check-out lines. I may have stumbled upon a whole new market here. Once I have the procedure down, I'm considering an instruction manual accompanied with a bonus tutorial DVD. I don't understand how the packing area knows what I put in the bag and what I've failed to put in the bag.

While buying one dozen light bulbs neatly placed in a cardboard holder, the scanner would not allow me to scan the same one twelve times without placing one in the "baggage holding area" each time. This meant removing each one from the convenient cardboard holder and placing them loosely in a bag in the "baggage holding area." Sounds like an important place, doesn't it...like maybe the "staging area" prior to a Broadway play, or the "holding cell" prior to prison sentencing, wasn't sure just yet if it was a good place or a very bad place. Then of course, when finished, I place the convenient cardboard holder in the "baggage holding area" so that I can use it for convenient storage when I get home, but lo and behold this very important "baggage holding area" will not allow it in the "baggage holding area" and the nice lady in the computer announces that a foreign object has been placed in the "baggage holding area." This confirms that the "baggage holding area" is not a very good place, but a very bad place and I don't want to go there ever again unless I know what I'm doing. Finally, the real nice lady (not the lady in the computer) who has the very important job of manning the self-help lines comes to my aid and removes the cardboard holder and places it in my shopping cart. Upon arrival at home, I lift the bag now filled with one dozen loose light bulbs and lo and behold the overfilled plastic bag tears down the side and all twelve light bulbs scatter to the ground, and luckily only one explodes. Well either way, one or all, I'm going back to exchange for another. Only this time, I will go to the customer service desk and the nice real lady behind the counter will allow me to get a new light bulb.

If only there was an instructional manual with a tutorial DVD, I would have saved myself a lot of time and energy (not to mention gas) before entering the self-help check-out line. So, what do you think, is there a market for this or what???